Shabbat Dinner With Bradley Manning, Julian Assange, and Edward Snowden

On Friday night, I thought it would be a great idea to have a big welcome home Shabbat dinner for my girlfriend’s sister. Earlier in the week she had returned from a month long trip to Poland and Israel and this seemed like a good way to re-unite everyone and talk about the trip. In theory, I was correct. In practice, my girlfriend’s sister couldn’t find anyone to cover her Friday night shift at work. Even so, we revised the plan. Shabbat dinner was still happening, but my girlfriend and I decided we would take her sister out for ice cream after work.

““Shabbat” is the Hebrew name for Saturday, the seventh day of the week. Since "day" in the Hebrew calendar goes from sunset to sunset, Shabbat (“Sabbath” in English) extends from just before sunset Friday to sundown on Saturday.” – Haaretz.com

I absolutely Love having Shabbat dinner at my girlfriend’s house. For one, the food her mother serves us is divine. But it’s more than that for me. Growing up as an only child raised by a single mother, I didn’t have a ton of family dinners. Don’t get me wrong, my mom would cook for us sometimes, but there are a lot of times I remember eating a frozen dinner in front of a television because she was working late. Plus, even when she did cook for us, it was always just the two of us. Part of what I Love so much about eating at my girlfriend’s house is the dynamic of a group conversation that is just completely different than a one-on-one.

When I eat Shabbat dinner with my girlfriend’s family, I feel like I’m a part of something bigger than myself. I feel accepted into their family. Growing up, I always dreamed of being part of a “normal” family and for me, Shabbat dinner is a dream come true. Not only is it fun and delicious, but it is also a holy and religious time to express gratitude for life.

“One might think that Shabbat, occurring once every seven days, is far from special. But even today, when most societies have some sort of weekend, the Jewish Sabbath is a radical game-changer: a reminder to the individual that the world does not revolve around her and her needs alone, that everyone can afford to break routine once a week, and contemplate the larger questions in life.” – Haaretz.com

This week, Shabbat was especially significant to me. We always have enjoyable conversation at dinner; but this week it was different. The air was relaxed. The flow of conversation was loose. Without second thought, the deepest details of my life started spilling out of me. After a year of knowing my girlfriend’s family, this is the first time I ever told them about my high school battle with oxycontin addiction.

And that wasn’t all. I started talking about my past friendships, my relationship with my family, and how I’ve felt about various events throughout my life. As I did, something amazing happened. A chain reaction started. Suddenly, everyone was going back and forth sharing deep and personal stories. Skeletons and Butterflies alike were flying out of the proverbial closet. After dinner, my girlfriend even mentioned her astonishment to me – “Tonight was amazing, everyone just started opening up and believe it or not, it was the first time I’ve heard some of those stories from my parents too.”

We connected as a family through open and honest communication. Trusting another person can be so rewarding. Our walls came down and nobody was holding back. It was beautiful. For me, it is moments like these that make life worth living. It is moments like these that I am sure I am doing something right with my life.

As I reflect upon the benefits of open, unrestricted communication, I can’t help but to notice a stark contrast between how family responds to honesty and how our government responds to honesty. In the past coupe of weeks, perhaps you have heard the names Bradley Manning, Julian Assange and Edward Snowden. If you haven't...

Bradley Manning is a former army intelligence analyst who submitted classified government documents to the website “WikiLeaks” in the belief that, “if the general public, especially the American public, had access to the information contained within the [Iraq and Afghan War Logs] this could spark a domestic debate on the role of the military and our foreign policy in general as well as it related to Iraq and Afghanistan.” –Bradley Manning (BradleyManning.org). He faces a sentence of 136 years in prison.

Julian Assange is the founder of the “WikiLeaks” website. He has fled the country and the United States is currently pursuing him.

Edward Snowden is the former NSA employee who revealed to America just how much the government is spying on us. He has fled the country and the United States is currently pursuing him.

In the eyes of the United States legal system, all three of these men are criminals for engaging in open, unrestricted communication, all with the intent to aid the citizens of America against a 1984-esque political regime.

There’s a quote that’s been floating around the Internet:

 “When exposing a crime is treated as a crime, you are ruled by criminals.” – Anonymous.

I’m not sure if the quote is from the hacker group Anonymous or if it is an anonymous quote, but either way it makes me think. Is it wrong to expose war crimes? Is it wrong to expose government crimes against our civil liberties? I don’t think it is.

 I don’t remember voting for the government to be able to read my e-mails, text-messages, Facebook messages, Google search history and more at the touch of a keyboard. In a representative Democracy, I do not understand who is being represented when the government spies on its citizens and hides the way it murders civilians in other countries.  I cannot believe that these policies are the desire of the majority.

And yet when we hear about this news, we don’t even bat an eyelash. Maybe if race were somehow involved, we’d see large-scale protests like we did for Trayvon. Instead, we let our government tell us that these men are criminals and we let them be persecuted for trying to save us from a government that does not represent our interests. It’s not right.

This week, let’s meditate on open and honest communication. Focus on letting down our walls and finding ways to trust one. Whether it is at the level of friends and family or at the level of national security, in the long term, the secrets we keep can be more hurtful than they are helpful. Communication is the most important part of any relationship. The words we say are the basis for the connections we share. The more we open up and tell the truth, the less of a distance there is between ourselves and the people around us. It feels good to be close to people. It feels good to all be a part of the same team. It feels good to all be on the same page. Through communication, we build unity, strength, and happiness. So whether it’s sharing a personal story with friends and family or joining together in protest against exploitation of basic human rights, let’s make an effort to communicate.